Trauma & EMDR- Part Five

The fact that traumatic experiences are encoded and stored differently in the brain explains why we can sometimes know things intellectually (in our head, in our logical brain), but we feel something entirely different (in our sensory responses and in our emotional brain). We may know intellectually that a person … Read More

Trauma & EMDR- Part Four

In this series, we’ve talked about big “T” and small “t” traumas; and I suggested that we’ve all experienced a trauma that has impacted us, whether or not we’ve named it as such. Big “T” traumas: life-threatening events; combat, crimes like rape, kidnapping, and assault; and natural disasters like earthquakes, … Read More

Trauma & EMDR- Part Three

Francine Shapiro, the creator of EMDR (I’ll explain EMDR later in the series), defines trauma as “any event that has had a lasting negative effect… When you lose your peace of mind, or if you never had it, there can be serious physical and psychological consequences no matter what the … Read More

Trauma & EMDR- Part Two

In Part one of this series on trauma and EMDR, we acknowledged that it’s not uncommon for us to have a hard time recognizing traumatic events in our own lives. The reason we may need to look carefully and honestly at our past is because traumatic incidents often hijack our current … Read More

Trauma & EMDR- Part One

Most of us consider a “traumatic” event to be something we hear about in the news – or those terrible things that happen to other people. We reserve the use of the word “trauma” for the experiences of war veterans or survivors of natural catastrophes or terrorist attacks. But trauma … Read More

Psychological Abuse – Part 1

abuse

When asked about the presence of “abuse” – many of us have our own mental images of what that means, and we’ll say things like, “My childhood was fine. My parents provided for all my needs and no one was abusive or anything.” It may be surprising to learn that … Read More

Emotion-Coaching Parents: Part 4

conflict

In The Science of Trust (2011), Dr. John Gottman identified two different types of parents: “emotion-coaching” parents and “emotion-dismissing” parents. This is the fourth blog of a four-part series, and instead of looking at what it means to be an emotion-coaching parent, this last one will address emotion-coaching your significant … Read More

Emotion-Coaching Parents: Part 3

emotion

In The Science of Trust (2011), Dr. John Gottman identified two different types of parents: “emotion-coaching” parents and “emotion-dismissing” parents. Read Part 1 for the hallmarks of emotion-coaching versus emotion-dismissing parents. So, you want your children to have the best shot at emotional intelligence and emotional resilience. You want them … Read More

Emotion-Coaching Parents: Part 2

emotion

In The Science of Trust (2011), Dr. John Gottman identified two different types of parents: “emotion-coaching” parents and “emotion-dismissing” parents. Read Part 1 for the hallmarks of emotion-coaching versus emotion-dismissing parents. Now that we’re clear about the differences, let’s talk about why it’s worth taking the time to implement emotion-coaching … Read More

Recognizing Safe People

empathy

One of our greatest needs is to be fully seen, fully known and fully loved. It’s really tough to do that if you’re not certain that you have anyone safe to share vulnerable moments and your ugliest struggles with. This is all so much more important and difficult if you … Read More