Three more tips to help open the lines of communication with teenagers.

1. Request your teenager’s opinion.  I know this sounds dangerous, but often parents can be stubborn or controlling and issue an ultimatum or make a demand rather than actually listening to their teenager. Often it is easier to focus on past mistakes versus focusing on the present situation.
2. Use “I statements” and express your feelings and what the cause of those feelings.

I feel frustrated when you leave your dishes on the table instead of carrying them to the sink.

I worry when you do not call and check in at the time you said you would.

1. Be willing to compromise.  Parents (and teenagers) can get stuck in their own point of view.  Try taking a different perspective and being open to navigating middle ground where both you and your teenager have a voice in a decision.

Marlayne Whitlock, M.A.

mwhitlock@ GROWcounseling.com