Many couples I work with are scrambling to identify relationship resolutions or goals they may have for the new year.

Coming into 2021 has been especially challenging for many couples.

They may find themselves taking a day by day approach as a way to cope with something hard.  This approach can be useful and necessary at times, but it has its limitations as well. These limits may include not having a clear sense of direction for the relationship, continuing to repeat unhelpful patterns and missed opportunities to grow the couple’s intimacy.

According to Merriam-Webster, the definition of resolution is the act or process of resolving. Considering how the pandemic, politics and protests may have impacted your relationship, now can be an important time to begin resolving those impacts with resolutions.

I recommend couples get intentional and identify their relationship resolutions for the upcoming year. 

Even if doing the whole “resolutions” thing is not your thing, taking an opportunity to talk about your relationship at a deeper level is an aspect of having a healthy relationship. Once you’ve accomplished this list, at least 1 resolution from each partner, you are ready to begin honoring them!

Honoring your relationship resolutions throughout the year is just as important as identifying them.

Remember a resolution is the act or process or resolving so it’s great for couples to have a plan.  Here are 3 ways I recommend couples honor their New Year’s resolutions throughout the year:

1. Identify clear measurable goals – this can include areas you may want to grow in. For example “we commit to go on a date at least 2 times per month”
2. Schedule check-ins throughout the year to evaluate progress. I suggest checking in at least 1 time every month of the year. 
3. If either partner feels challenged or stuck in the process of achieving their resolutions, start couples counseling. Couples can learn to overcome their challenges and honor their relationship resolutions.

Written by: Porsha Jones