One of my favorite bands is The Civil Wars. One of the first songs I heard was called “Poison and Wine”. The song is about the realization of a couple that their marriage is not perfect and frankly, that they do not even like each other sometimes, but they are committed to each other. They realize that even though they might not feel “love” for each other at that moment of time, they will always love each other. The chorus of the song is a repetitive “I don’t love you but I always will”.

Does this song remind you of your marriage? Do you feel stuck in a rut and that you and your partner are at odds with each other? I hope that this song encourages you and your partner to know that you are not alone. Though you or your spouse may not feel the love in your relationship, you can still love each other in the imperfections you have and that your relationship has. My favorite line of the whole song is a great summation of the hope that this artist has for the relationship, “I don’t have a choice but, I still choose you”. I hope that you and your partner find hope in this song for your relationship.

www.thecivilwars.com
http://youtu.be/WfzRlcnq_c0

Poison & Wine

You only know what I want you to
I know everything you don’t want me to
Your mouth is poison, your mouth is wine
You think your dreams are the same as mine

I don’t love you but I always will
I don’t love you but I always will
I don’t love you but I always will
I always will

I wish you’d hold me when I turn my back
The less I give the more I get back
Your hands can heal, your hands can bruise
I don’t have a choice, but I still choose you
Adam R Glendye MA MFT, LAPC
aglendye@ growcounseling.com