Defining Ourselves

Have you ever let another person’s perception of you define how you make choices and how you behave? 

For most of us, our families are the places we learn how we are perceived.  Sometimes the words of those closest to us have the power to inflict the most pain.  Were you in a family where comparisons were (and maybe still are) made of you and your siblings or another family member?  One strives for excellent grades, the other flounders in school.  One remains quiet and reserved, another who demands to be heard at any cost.  Rule follower.  Rule breaker. Maybe you’ve heard this comparison:  “You are just like ______.”  (Fill in blank with a name that raises your hackles because usually it is not a comparison we want to define us in any way.) 

When we let others compare and define who we are, we sometimes take on roles that are simply assigned by others. 

A shift occurs when we allow our lives to speak to us and we begin to define ourselves.  We become narrators in our story, developing into the people we tell ourselves we are becoming.  How do you define yourself? Weak or Strong?  Abandoned or Cherished and Loved?  Allow your own voice into the story of who you are becoming.

Written by: GROW Staff

Article updated: January 31, 2024