Overcoming Unkindness

unkindness, self-compassion, overcoming unkindness

Have you ever been in situations where you have been subjected to other people’s snide remarks or mockery (of course, under the guise of innocent teasing). So how can you overcome unkindness?

When you are subjected to this type of unkindness by friends or by family members, it can be easy to make an excuse.

“Perhaps they are just having a bad day or they are just teasing. I shouldn’t be so sensitive.”  However, sometimes teasing can feel more like meanness. You may leave your friends feeling inadequate or worthless and then question why you are friends with them.

The most effective reaction to unkindness is to be able to express compassion.

In order to have compassion for others, it is critical to be able to practice self-compassion. This means feeling the hurt of the other persons’ actions and the messages that it gave you. If someone’s words bothered you in some way, instead of brushing it off or pushing it down, it is helpful to explore what bothered you about their message and feeling the affects of that hurt.

Compassion enables us to see the hurt, insecurity, and wounds of the person who is behaving in an unkind manner.

Written by: Chelsey Beauchamp, LPC

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